Something is missing

What is missing? A feeling. A skill. Something.

I don’t get this feeling often, but here it is. I finished GrooveyD newsletter, and something was missing. Not in the newsletter. In general.

Well, there is a lot of missing in the newsletter. It’s just a matter of time to get the right feelings out. To find the right process, things like that.

There is something else missing. Something bigger. Something deeper. Something unknown and unexplainable.

A logical question to ask myself was, What is missing? What am I missing in this moment?

Answer I received was ‘More action’. To be more proactive, less reactive. What does it mean? Many things. One, I’m too passive. Two, I need more order in my life. Defensive reaction of course is that I like chaos. Let’s do a compromise. An order within chaos.

It could also mean to focus on practicing relevant skills. I find way too many skills relevant. Sigh. And I could add even more. So I need to order them. To put them in stages.

I was playing with an idea to gamify my life. I might actually do this to bring some order.

Recently (few minutes ago) I read “The first 20 hours, How to learn anything” by Josh Kaufman. It’s a nice little book. Gives me some ideas how to approach this order making.

In big sweeps, I should write down all the skills/knowledge I currently want to learn and practice. Organize them by priority. Figure out top 10 or even top 5. Break those skills in subskills. Practice them one by one. Something like that. And practice means doing not reading about it. Totally guilty about this.

What else is missing? Can’t ask this question a lot. I’ll open a flood gate that won’t stop for a while. I already see that I miss adventures.

No idea how interesting this is, but as I see an answer, my mind has an excuse ready. If I present a counterpoint, I’m being called stupid.

As you can see I am separating myself from the mind. Which is silly. I suppose you can call it Ego too. But what is Ego? Is it separate being or is it you? So is mind. I am my mind. It is not a separate entity.

Actually that is an interesting question. Can you create a counterpoint to your own excuses?

If you can, then logically you know what to do. What is stopping you?

If I consciously know what I should do, why am I not doing it? Am I waiting for an inspiration? A permission? Or a specific skill level?

It’s worth to explore.