That last push of the change

Just one step. That’s all you need to be in the new world.

And you hesitate. You don’t make that last step. Why not? The road map you crafted so carefully is there. In your hand. Why can’t you follow it? From A to B, to C. Easy. But here we are. Still standing with our map in the hand.

Maybe you step in the new world. Walk a little bit and return back. That world wasn’t for you, so you make some changes to the map. I suppose we are now talking about the magic map. Map is essentially a guide of directions. Real maps doesn’t change reality itself. But in the world without internet, it would be possible to mess around. Four different maps that theoretically lead to the same place. Four different places labeled the same. And four people that follow these maps will think that they have arrived in the place they searched for. That’s a medieval prank. Our map is magical. When you change contents of the map, you also make the change to the reality of the future.

Tweaking the map is not a bad thing. But do you really need to do it in the old world? In the place you know nothing works?

“It’s safe in the old world,” you might yell, “it’s comfortable.”

That is indeed the truth. If you see the new world as dangerous, unpleasant then it’s the valid yell. It’s also a guarantee to live in the old world forever. Like a maniac you’ll change the map everyday, trying to make it perfect. Then you’ll die in the midst of unfinished maps. Bye, old man maniac.

What if the new world is exciting? Full with unknown adventures. New people. New places. Would you still not step over that invisible line? You could even forget the map. Go where you want. Explore what you desire. Screw the old world. It didn’t work anyway.

How long that bright moment will last? Until your first excuse. And it’s over.

I’ve been stepping in the new worlds for a while now. Of course, I’m guilty of returning to the old world. What can I say, it’s safe. And, of course, my own limiting beliefs. That is interesting, though. What I wrote above is pretty much adaptable to my thinking too. When I look at my new world, I see what I will lose. Yes, I also see what I will gain, but the thought stream of what I’ll lose overwhelms it. To counter that I should write what I’ll gain and expand it. Or better yet. Zoom in. By zooming in the limitations will open up. Just like microscopic worlds through the microscope.

This stepping in and out is not quite useless. I’ve gathered what works. Discarded what doesn’t work. Everything that works I put in my travel bag. I see it, but I don’t use it. Not, yet. My mind is interesting. I can be spontaneous if I’m prepared. But that’s not the over-the-top preparation. Simple general information, with option to keep learning on the way. Enough to satisfy my curiosity.

Metaphorical travel bag is old. Just like everything else in the old world. And I can’t get a new one here. To get a new one, I must step in the new world one last time. Actually it’s funny. I need to do the same thing, I did when I got out of my inner darkness. Step out of it and destroy the way back. For the old world it would mean to watch it crumble. I mean it’s already crumbling. A ticking time bomb. Question is, will I crumble with it or not.

My prolonged hesitation is understandable. I’ve been building the new world with little pieces. Obviously it looks small. Thus, I need to take my own advice. I need to zoom in to see how big this new world really is.

There is a freedom within limitations.

A penny for your thoughts